Here’s even more of a reason to pick up the BFP Express when you see it: exercise your intellectual (and comical) abilities by participating in the newly implemented “Caption Contests”. Simply create a caption to go along with the photo, text it to 25543 with the keyword: BFPXCC, and win!

Now, I know you can think of something witty to say there.

And, naturally, prizes are going to be cool as ice; think free lunch, sweet gear from local businesses, or newly released albums, like Jay-Z’s “Blueprint 3”. So get to it!

And no, I’m not trying to make a blatant reference to our generation. I’m talking about the film that’s going to be released this upcoming Monday. I’m talking about the film that you all need to see.

It’s been referred to as “An Inconvenient Truth, but with a personality” by the LA Times; Ken Livingstone says that “Every single person in this country should be forcibly made to watch this film”; and it’s “The first successful dramatization of Climate Change to hit the big screen”, according to The Guardian.

Directed by Franny Armstrong, “Age of Stupid” boasts only one real actor, Pete Postlethwaite, but it’s definitely not lacking in plot or pathos. In fact, the other 7 “actors” are in fact real people from climate hotspots worldwide. Furthermore, the film is based entirely on sound science, citing the predictions of the IPCC and other peer-reviewed papers.

Pete stars as a man living in year 2055, looking back at old footage from 2008 and asking himself why humans didn’t take the chance to do something about climate change.

And on the evening of September 21, just before the UN General Assembly’s climate session, the film will be launched internationally at the “biggest and greenest live film event the world has ever seen”. In downtown New York, celebrities will walk the so-called green carpet to a solar powered cinema tent, linked by satellite to 700 cinemas in more than 50 countries.

Thankfully, we here in Vermont aren’t excluded for once. But spots are limited. “Age of Stupid” is only being screened at Palace 9 in South Burlington at 7:30pm on September 21.

So, please, for the love of our planet: round up a few of your most decent friends and family and check out one of the year’s most anticipated - and most influential - films.

Get more information, peep the trailer, and purchase tickets at the film’s site.

As we steadily creep forward through time, the Maya’s and their alleged predictions about the end of time  (December 21, 2012, in case you want to mark it on your calendar) rise to the forefront of prophetic discussions about the future. But it seems like there is a lot of misinterpretation going on.

Sure, the Maya’s were cool. Any ancient civilization that can boast the only complete written language system of pre-Columbian America has my respect. Their hearty contributions to art, architecture and astronomy aren’t overlooked either.

In fact, the Mayans, using a complicated three calendar method of tracking time - the most complex of which is the Long Count Calendar, detailing time as they knew it, from beginning to end  - predicted every single solar and lunar eclipse through 2012. And they determined just how long a year is, right down to the thousandth decimal point, one-uping the Greeks.

There’s even a few rumors that they predicted World Wars.

So yeah, they’re creepily credible.

But the truth of it is: the Maya’s don’t explicitly say what will happen on 12/21/2012. It’s just the last day they chose to record, for whatever reason. The Maya’s also firmly held to the idea that time was in fact cyclic, eradicating all “ends” by thinking of them as “new beginnings”.

Besides, any written record of their exact beliefs was likely destroyed by fire during the Spanish invasion, after which only a few scriptures survived.

One thing is for sure about that fateful December day, though. In the sky, far, far away, the sun will gracefully slide into a position that is the exact center of the axes of the Milky Way and the Galactic Equinox, forming a perfect alignment in the center of the galaxy. And it will stay there for a few moments, it being a Solstice and all.

This, too, sounds crazy; but it’s in fact a rare occurrence that happens every 25,800 years. Considering the Earth’s been around for 4.5 billion, it’s clearly survived it about 150,000 times.

As with all things open for interpretation, varied responses will bloom. The two most popular interpretations of the Maya’s prediction of ‘The End of Time’ are in fact opposites of one another:

1) optimistic New Age philosophers believe the end of 2012 will mark a divine transformation into the most peaceful, interconnected and positively spiritual state our world has ever known.

2) pessimistic Doomsayers claim that the world will in fact come to an end, citing probably apocalyptic events such as nuclear war, Biblical Judgment Day, or an all-encompassing magical “poof”, and we’re gone.

So what do you believe? Should we be stocking up on Tibetian Prayer Flags and Hummus in anticipation of the a peaceful, free-loving era or should be we building underground bunkers and stocking up on water in anticipation of … the end?

Honestly, I think we’ll all make it.

And we’re all enthralled. So let’s dissect it.

First, it’s got a real classy looking cover. Reddish, leatherish, refined with gold print and gold touches on the pages and an “old-school bookmarking ribbon thingy” according to Efe’s “old-school bookmarking” expertise. (Which is, mind you, quite expansive). Side note: how much do you think Burton spent to publish these guys anyway?

You can even personalize it by filling in your name under the “This Book Belongs To” section on the inside back cover or the “Dear New Rider” section in the front. Which will make you feel cool. Along with the Free Learn to Ride Lesson and Lift Ticket Package coupon you get if you buy certain boards.

The majority of the Good Book is in fact a catalogue of Burton apparel and gear, of which the new “Easy Livin”, “Love” and “Hate” boards stand out with their artistic designs and pathos pulls. There are a few new plaid prints for apparel that, obviously, riders and general hipsters alike will dig, and a lot of new, earth-toned outerwear pieces that are sure to please the more conservative outdoorsmen.

Furthermore, the Book’s got multiple size, shape, comfort, and ridability charts, which are incredibly useful and surprisingly fun to read, so we’ll just go ahead and say the layout and design of the book is beyond awesome. The Good Book also comes complete with mid-section of high quality, glossy photographs that are certified suitable as wall art for broke students and / or those obsessed with Burton.

Sweet additions: A symbol of a white dove with a yellow scroll marked “GMP” adorns any of Burton’s products which fall under the Green Mountain Project umbrella, which is devoted to eco-friendly production. A symbol of a hand sprinkling snow flakes adorns any of Burton’s products which are specially created for the new, emerging rider.

I’m going to get back to mindless perusal now. Wee!

Ever find yourself cursing Facebook as you stumble across a friend’s page that’s complete with 28 applications, 13 upcoming events, some stupid thing about Mafia Wars and a laundry-list of responses to a mindless status update? Chances are you do. On the reg.

So for you, and me, and whoever else wishes Facebook would stop excessively adding applications like an Italian adds toppings to a pizza, there’s the newly launched preview for Facebook Lite, accessible now by logging in at www.lite.facebook.com.

The Lite version boasts a simpler, cleaner design, reminscient of Facebook’s early design stages. It’s main premise is that it’s much faster loading and thus a better option for those browsing Facebook from computers with slower internet connections. As of now, Facebook Lite is only available to those in the US and India.

Some people are already viewing the revamping as an effort on Facebook’s part to be a bit more like Twitter, focusing on real-time updates and messaging. Along the same lines, Facebook has also recently announced they will be supporting @mentions in status updates, which they dub ‘tagging’, enabling users to references friends, groups and events directly.

Facebook Lite has a simpler top toolbar, one-click buttons for status updates and media uploads, and eradicates most of the “bells and whistles” you previously felt bogged down by on your profile. The most noticeable change is the drastic decrease in third-party applications. You get the wall, info, friends, photos and media.

And that’s it. Touche.

The Bilodeau family of Falmouth Massachusetts embarked on a nice little cruise this past June. While approximately 600 miles off the coast of North Carolina, quite near Bermuda, the daughter, 8-year old Meagan, tossed a bottle containing a letter she wrote into the Atlantic. She hoped someone in a faraway place like Europe, for example, would find it and that they’d become great pen pals.

But she was let down.

Because the bottle followed her home.

Nearly a month after the toss, 11-year old Teddy, whose family is from Colorado, spotted the floating bottle as she was boating with her parents off of Vineyard Sound in Massachusetts - just 15 to 20 miles from where Meagan lives.

Teddy wrote to Meagan at the end of last month, letting her know where she found the bottle. Both parties were, presumably, out of their minds with disbelief. Technically speaking, the bottle should have followed currents towards the UK, but an eddy could have changed its path. Remarkable. And freaky.

The two girls are nonetheless excited to be pen-pals.

Check out the full story at CNN.

Today marks the second day of Burlington’s own Intervale Center Online Auction, which remains open for bidding through September 30th and open for donations through September 18th.

Unlike most traditional auctions, 100% of the profits from this one will stay local, providing support for Intervale Center programs such as farming, local food systems and the upkeep of the Intervale’s 350+ acres of land and trails. And it’s all online, so you don’t have to worry about a pounding migraine induced by an old man with a dreadfully monotone voice saying “Going Once, Going Twice…”

Auction items include foodstuffs and gift certificates from local farms and restaurants, a weekend getaway to a waterfront Condo in Massachusetts, a signed copy of environmentalist Bill McKibben’s “Places from an Active Life”, an hour massage with Alora Grooms, and a 2-year supply of Intervale Compost, among many others.

As of today, the Auction has raised $2,127.00 with a total of 94 bids. To get your virtual bid on, visit http://www.cmarket.com/auction/AuctionHome.action?vhost=intervalecenter.

Yusef Lateef: Other Sounds, Downtown Discs - $8

Mr. Lateef is a fantastic jazz musician who is most notable for his flute/sax playing.  On this album, he rocks his signature instrument and brings four others along for the ride, and delivers his unique signature to some great tunes.  This session was recorded in 1957 and dances circles around many albums released in this period.

Bill Idol: Don’t Stop, Downtown Discs - $4

This disc consists of Mony Mony and Dacing With Myself, which makes it an instant classic. Billy is wearing a wife-beater and has spiked hair. You won’t mistake this album for something else.

Hank Williams: The Hank Williams Story, Pure Pop - $3

It has 4 records with 48 of Hank Williams best loved songs. I love country and Hank Williams is pure country.

Animal Collective: Strawberry Jam, Pure Pop - $17.97

This is my favorite Animal Collective record.  It has some of their strongest tracks to date without any misses.  The price is deserved because it’s relatively new and it’s a double LP.

The Mountain Goats: Tallahassee, Pure Pop - $15.97

The first Mountain Goats album devoid of recordings from John Darnielle’s signature Panasonic RX-FT500 boombox, this is a beautifully written album.  In November, I’ll be seeing them with Final Fantasy, so this record seemed particularly tempting today.

This is Kathy Soulia, Senior Client Strategist. She is a fine mama of money making. She loves to tell people what to do in the office, but when she goes out to lunch at Rooney’s, they tell her what to eat. She lives to generate as much capital for her clients as she possibly can, but despises paperwork. She absolutely, positively would never ever re-name the Burlington Free Press because of the honor and distinction it carries. Her favorite drink is Magic Hat Blind Faith, which they no longer manufacture because they never asked her opinion of it.

Above is Rebecca Green, a Sales Executive. She rather enjoys words and saying them, especially to other people. She’s a rabid fan of uncooked fish and more specifically, Sakura Bana. She loves Barefoot wine, and its bargain basement price. If given the opportunity to rename the Burlington Free Press, she would rename it Burlington’s Best. The worst part of her job are the people who cry when she calls them about business matters. It happens several times per week.